It’s uh-me, dashoff-o

Seriously, I don’t know that anyone should watch this. I mean, clearly you should, because there was effort put in on my part (not really) and it’s super entertaining (it’s not).

I should have gone into sales!

But anyway, LOTS of ladies who are going to the Blathering (and some who are NOT) have been doing these accent vlogs, and I decided if I was going to keep whining at people to do them, I should get with the program and make one myself. (Note: no one asked me to do one. I’m just ASSUMING that everyone wants to hear my lovely voice.)

Because last year? At the Blathering? I HAD NONE VOICE. NONE.

So here I am! (I apologize for the weird background sound … my Macbook is a few years old and the microphone probably has a Cheerio in it or something.)

If you want to join in, here’s what you’re supposed to do:

Say the following words:

Aunt, route, wash, oil, theatre, iron, salmon, caramel, fire, water, sure, data, ruin, crayon, toilet, New Orleans, pecan, both, again, probably, spitting image, Alabama, lawyer, coupon, mayonnaise, syrup, pajamas, caught

And answer these questions:

What is it called when you throw toilet paper on a house?

What is the bug that curls into a ball when you touch it?

What is the bubbly carbonated drink called?

What do you call gym shoes?

What do you say to address a group of people?

What do you call the kind of spider that has an oval-shaped body and extremely long legs?

What do you call your grandparents?

What do you call the wheeled contraption in which you carry groceries at the supermarket?

What do you call it when rain falls while the sun is shining?

What is the thing you use to change the TV channel?

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16 Comments

Filed under Not even kidding

16 responses to “It’s uh-me, dashoff-o

  1. I’m sure you get this a lot; nonetheless, you are hilarious.

    Plus, I think we have the same glasses! You don’t know me, so that likely has no impact on your day whatsoever!

  2. Jen

    Do you live near Tampa? I have relatives in Brooksville and Spring Hill! You sound a lot like my aunt and cousin, just a touch of a southern accent. Love it.

    Also: you’re adorable. And I say q-pon. Sorry 🙂

    • Yes, indeed! I’ll wave to them from my window. Or WINDA, southern-style.

      I’ll forgive the q-pon thing on account of you calling me adorable. That was very well executed.

  3. -R-

    You are very funny.

    Your reasoning for sneakers doesn’t work unless you’re doing lots of sneaking. Which maybe you are. I don’t know you. But, really, I think sneakers is just as illogical as tennis shoes.

    • Oh but I DO sneak. I sneak and creep all about the house, careful not to wake the children — NEVER WAKE THE CHILDREN.

      Of course, we don’t wear shoes in the house, so I do that barefoot. BESIDE THE POINT, says I. CLEARLY I do a lot of sneaking.

  4. OMG, please don’t take this as anything but a compliment, but you are SO YOUNG! Like, in a fresh faced and youthful looking way, not in a “you’re too young to be bearing children” way.

    Err, not that I thought you were OLD, before I saw you, but I guess I assume everyone I interact with on the internet is my age, and that is clearly not the case.

    Anyhoo, going to shut up now.

    • How dare you come here to my blog and tell me I look young! Why, in ALL my days I have never been so insul–

      I FREAKING LOVE YOU.

      No, really. I just turned 30, and 30 is definitely not old, but maaaan. Three kids and all that leaves me feeling positively ancient. For what it’s worth, I assumed you were the same age as me — you definitely don’t look any older in your pictures.

  5. You are so damn charming. LOVE YOU. I laughed out loud when you pointed up and to the right at the X that would just “close this whole thing”. But I watched the rest because you = charming and adorable.

  6. This is great! You’re adorable. And I have hair envy. AND I have a Mom-Mom too! I had no idea there were ANY other Mom-Mom’s!

    You sound like me. I got nuthin’. I wish I were going to The Blathering because I think you’d be on my list of people to hang out with.

    xxoo

    • I’ve never heard of another Mom Mom either! I found it exactly one time on a greeting card, years and years after she died, and I bought it anyway.

      I’m also not going to be at the Blathering this year, so hopefully we’ll BOTH get to be there next year!

  7. barbetti

    Diane, you crack me UP! FTR, I also pronounce it as “q-pon” and I’m not sure why. Navy brat, grew up all over (Cali, Colorado, Florida, Virginia, South Carolina, New England…). For the longest time, I couldn’t pronounce “breakfast” properly. I called it “bref-fast”. I hope you won’t disown me.

    I have to agree, you look super young and fresh and it’s making my haggard-looking self mighty jealous.

  8. I love you. Let’s make out.

    (What?)

  9. OMG! Yes! There are no such thing as JAWmies. Whether you say paJAMas or paJAWmas (and I say both), they are always, always JAMmies. MY husband tried to say JAWmies and I wanted to punch him somewhere soft. I didn’t. I just mocked him into submission instead.

    He also says Q-pon, but I didn’t know that until we watched this, so feel free to mock him too.

  10. I love how conflicted you are about the pahjahmas.